New Record!

This morning I woke up to -24 degrees F. That's cold. In fact, it's my personal record of coldness, surpassing -20 from four winters ago. What happens at -24? Well, your nose hairs freeze with every breath. The only cars that start are ones with engine block heaters or new batteries (we replaced ours last summer. Go us!). Your dog's urine freezes in a stream when she goes outside. Ok, just kidding on that one. Oh, and your laundry room freezes.

So, last night I decided to do a load of laundry. I go downstairs to the Dungeon, and move the load that was in there from earlier this week to the dryer. Frozen. Solid. Big icebergs of clothing, all frozen to the interior of the washing machine. I pulled it all out, with some difficulty, and put them in the dryer and started it. GUH-BUNK GUH-BUNK GUH-BUNK said the dryer, as it defrosted the icebergs.

I loaded the washing machine and started it, and nothing happened. The intake hoses to the washing machine were frozen. This has happened before. I pulled out a little space heater that we have for such an occasion, pointed it at the intake hoses, and turned it on. A half hour later, and I was in business; the washing machine turned on and began the load. I came back down another half hour after that to move the clothes to the dryer, opened the machine, and to my chagrin noted that the washing machine was completely full of water. I turned the dial back to spin cycle, hit the button, and it spun but no water came out. The outtake hose must be frozen, I figured, so I pointed the space heater (not a very powerful one, as you must have guessed) at the back of the machine and went upstairs for another half hour; at the end of that period it still wasn't working, so I went back upstairs to wait it out.

It is now after 1 a.m. When I came back downstairs and hit the spin cycle button, the machine began to drain. This was good. The machine drains into a laundry basin sink we have, which then drains to the sewer. Unfortunately, the sink was filling and filling but not draining. When the sink reached fullness, I was forced to turn off the machine. And then, of course, to turn the space heater on to the drain pipe.

It is now nearly 2 a.m. Despite my desire for the clothes, I see that my quest for clothes is not going to be successful. I go to bed.

In the morning, the drain pipe is now unfrozen and the machine drains.

I hate the cold. It's fully 130 degrees colder than it was here this summer. Hell, it's almost 35 degrees colder than you people (MOM) complaining about it being 10 degrees. It's only 74 degrees warmer than it was on Mars the first week of the Spirit rover's mission.

Yeah, it's cold.

A link: An amusing cartoon story about a guy and his quest to know the plot without seeing the movie for "Maid in Manhattan." I shudder to admit that I've seen this hunk of crap. And as a tangent, Manhattan is where I'll be come Sunday.